Shape, Size, Brand
You have to knock on a lot of doors until one opens.
Unless. You know which door to knock on.
This is why people get so frustrated with shopping (and dating?) for themselves. If you don't want to drown in frustration, you have to know your body, what shapes work for your body and what brands to invest in. If you know your body but keep trying to fit into brands that aren't meant for you, you're going to stay frustrated. If you know what brands work for you but you are hell bent on being/buying a certain size, you're going to stay frustrated. Sizes are just numbers, they're nothing to get attached to.
This weekend one my bff's, Lo Myrick (also my biz coach!) was in town and we went for a little shop sesh to grab her a killer outfit for the weekend. Quick (physical) profile on this bad ass:
Lo was a D1 and D2 collegiate swimmer and she's got a rockin' athlete's bod. We are the same height (5'7), we probably weigh the same and I'm pretty sure we wear even the same size bra. Standing side by side we look like two 30-something athletes that could plow down a field together.
Lo rolled into town from Charlotte, NC on Friday afternoon and met me at Lenox (duh) where I pulled this pair of ALL SAINTS shorts for her...
They were perfect. They looked like her. They were interesting (as in not blue denim.) They fit JUST right. Here's her selfie (sent from Charlotte after she went home!):
We were kind of in a rush but I told her that I had to try them on myself when we got back to my place!
But what worked magically on her, didn't work on me at all. Although we are the same height/weight, Lo's torso is slightly longer, her hips are far more narrow and she doesn't have the booty I've got. Where Lo's sizing is proportionate from butt to hip to waist, my butt is one size and my waist is a different size (evidence.) I seriously struggled to get her size 28 mid-rise shorts over my butt and then they looked like this... (womp womp)
Lo was AMAZED that we didn't fit into the same denim in the same way but I wasn't surprised at all. My body shape requires a lot of stretch to hug in the right places and I need a high-waist rise no matter what. To prove a point -- I love to prove a point (obviously) -- I ran to my closet and grabbed my beloved Madewell High-Rise button-fly denim from the Summer 2017 collection:
Look at how differently this shape // high waist, size // 25 and brand // Madewell fit me. These puppies come up and over my butt and curve back into the waist like a proper high-waisted denim should...
Maybe you've gotten super frustrated while shopping. Imagine if Lo had MY shape and was hell-bent on wearing All Saints denim. I didn't get bent out of shape about her cute AF jean shorts not working for me because I know what DOES work for me.
I hear "nothing fits me" like... every day. Something does fit you. Lots of things will fit you. You can't expect to wear the same thing as your bestie, no matter how similarly you may look in terms of size. You can't expect for every brand to work on your shape. You gotta throw the sizing issue out the window. Lo has a smaller butt and wore a 28 in All Saints. My booty is muscular AF and I'm wearing a Madewell size 25.
Try until you find the right shape, size and brand(s) for you. But! Don't get stuck (or sad!) if a certain trend or style isn't working for you. Discover what brands are cut similarly. Go as deep as figuring out what fabrics look best across your chest, back, etc. Unless you're with a guru (and even still if you are!)
It's about the fabric, the cut, the design, the brand.
Feeling your best is intertwined with what you put on your body. If it doesn't fit, you're going to feel it. If you feel it, it's going to show in the way that you SHOW UP. In life, in general. So, how do you want to show up?