LILLIAN CHARLES

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hot damn ((YOU)) look amazing

I recently went on a date with a guy who wouldn't stop saying that he was "such a bum."  From that point on, it didn't matter what "credentials" he had that made me want to go on that first (albeit last) date with this dude because all I saw after he said that was, well, a bum.  I'm sure his mama sees something else in the kid but once he'd spoken his reality about himself to me... that was that.

Speaking (and acting) your reality into existence is real, ya'll. 

TED talks are kind of my jam, send me a link to your fav, click here.  Here's one I'm really digging right now: Fake it Til You Become It by Amy Cuddy -- who is just adorable, btw.  Here's Amy's research in a visual: 
click image to see all details and read article.
Amy's research shows that when you position your body in a powerful stance for as little as two minutes, you feel more powerful.  I love that she calls it "faking it til you become it" instead of "faking it til you make it" (I mean "making it" is relative anyway, right?)  

Slightly switching gears to a more verbal approach to "faking it til you become it."  Do you know how often I hear negative self-talk with my clients?  I mean, scratch that, CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE?!?!  It's not just one-on-one situations.  I noticed it when I worked at lululemon (over the course of a year), too.  I mean how many times can one person listen to women bash themselves in front of the mirror in one six hour shift?  Again, it's a lot to take in!  So, about three weeks into working at 'the lemon in 2012, I implemented a #StylishEmpowerment strategy:
HOT DAMN!
I LOOK AMAZING!

Imagine the reactions of my co-workers and the store's guests...

Like who is this conceited girl
and why the hell is she talking about 

how awesome she looks? 

When was the last time you heard a fellow-shopper or friend say "I LOOK SO GREAT!"?  Yeah, that's what I thought.  Possibly... never?  How often do you hear "OMG, get this off of me, ew, I look like a ________"?  A tad more frequently?  Me too.

from one of my fav films, The Emperor's New Groove
Now hear me out, I'm okay with calling a spade a spade.  When it's a flop, it's a flop.  And I may be the first to explain how, why and where it doesn't work.  I recently told a client she looked like a linebacker in a jacket that she wanted to keep.  See?  It's okay to make fun of something when it's just not quite right... but we don't have to make it negative and terrible.

When something "works," why aren't we just as quick to celebrate the situation -- whether it's that you're spanx-free or you finally found the color of lipstick that makes you feel super sexy?

How often do you put something on and think 
"HOT DAMN, I LOOK AMAZING!"?   

What if you had to make that declaration (and believe it) before you walked out the door OR made a clothing purchase.  Would you be wearing what you're wearing right now?  Would you save a boat-load of money?

One of my most recent clients emailed me and said that she's been asked multiple times if she's had a face lift (she's in her 60's)! No face lift, just a put-together, "I look amazing" attitude.  When you look good, you feel good.  

You start to figure out what works for you, what helps you with the "hot damn I look amazing" process.  For me, it's glitter nail polish (ain' no shame), bright lipsticks, killer shoes, big jewelry, all things girlie while still being 100% comfortable in my clothes (and my own skin):


I challenge you to say it, believe it, become it:
"Hot damn! I look AMAZING!"

and

tag it up:
#StylishEmpowerment